“Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”
– Philippians 3:13-14

A commitment to improve ourselves through Christ, can seem to be bad and restrictive, but with a manageable plan and follow through, it is actually freeing.  It has been said that if you want something different, you have to do something different.  The first key to making a change in your behavior is making a commitment.  You must see the goal you are walking towards, know that it is worthwhile, and have a desire to walk to it, no matter the obstacles that come.  In this commitment, you become single-minded (Philippians 3:13-14).

When I first committed my life to Christ, I wanted confidence.  I was a shy wallflower, so I wanted to be able to have conversations with people, to give my opinion instead of just answering questions, and maybe even introduce myself or help someone else that felt uncomfortable.  At the time, I was so uncomfortable in my own skin, that I avoided people like the plague, and when forced into situations, I was sure not to talk, or probably move, unless given a job to do.

For me, when I began to pursue confidence over anxiety, I had to overcome the thought that this was my lot in life.  I was the quiet kid; therefore, I would always watch life from the outside and not participate.  I didn’t think that I had anything to offer people other than anxiety and stress.  I had to believe that God had more for me, and that I could live with purpose free of fear.  This, in some ways, may have been the hardest step to take.  I had to start with changing my mindset and my perception of self.

Once you’ve made up your mind and committed yourself, start small.  Whatever you choose to do, make it small and manageable within your current life.  Don’t make a plan to change all of your habits tomorrow.  It won’t work.  For me, I had to, despite my feelings, not avoid people.  I had to know that even if I had nothing to give, I could be present.  This wasn’t easy, and many times it wasn’t pleasant.  Thank goodness I had patient and kind friends that are still in my life 20 years later.

As you begin to make these small sacrifices and see yourself in a new light, you’ll see more and more things that you can do to reach your goal.  Eventually I began interjecting into conversations, even when it was awkward, and I felt queasy and began to sweat. At times, I got into arguments, because I didn’t understand nuances of interactions, and I am still often confused about how to respond to people.  But as I’ve gained confidence through Christ, I’ve been able to start looking out.  I don’t just think about my suffering and nervousness (1 John 3:17).

I am not perfect by any measure, but I can tell you that in the areas of my life that I have committed to Christ, He has shown me more of Him and allowed relationships to develop and mature that I could not have created or sustained.  The discipline that I’ve committed to walking has been rewarded handsomely and brought freedom to love that I could not have imagined before my commitment. but Christ could not give it until I reached toward Him and made little changes daily.  So, commit, make a plan, amend it, try again until you can begin chipping away at your own selfishness and allow Christ in your life daily.

“Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven.”
Matthew 7:21

– Kati

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